THE FLAMBOYANT YEARS OF ONE FAILED STAR.

LES FLAMBOYANTES ANNÉES D'UNE STAR RATÉE, by Pascal H.
*SHORT EXTRACTS* OF THE 2012 FINAL VERSION RIGHT HERE!

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Tuesday, June 14, 2011

Une enfance religieuse / One religious childhood. E->


English translation below.


Quelques Extraits...


''J'avais eu droit à tout. La nature m'avait gâté. Une mère bourgeoisement obsolète et chrétienne, un père juif, un nom de famille arabe, et ma vie homosexuelle de grande traînée en vadrouille. Je ne comptais plus les nombres de fois quand j'avais entendu des passants dans la rue, les écoliers à l'école, les copains du lycée catholique, pour un oui pour un non et en toute circonstance les gloses de 'sale juif', de 'sale pédé', de 'sale arabe' ou bien encore celles de 'sale goy' lorsqu'au mariage de mes parents à l'âge de quatorze ans ils décidèrent que je continuerais mes études dans une école juive. Les derniers de ce gymnase étaient précoces après leur bar-mitzva. 'Goy' certes, j'étais un gentil. Mais avant tout pour eux une gentille qui ne les contrariait plus de ne pas être entièrement juive dès lors que nous jouions au papa et à la maman les jeudis après-midis. Ils m'avaient tôt appris et sans hésitation les griseries et aptitudes d'une bite circoncise. ''


I did not have that many options to quit that miserable flock whose only lovers they had was a cross, a candlestick with six branches or a crescent moon. And my rump for charity.


''I had heard it all over and over again and I had heard it the hard way. A fucking queer, a dirty Jew, a filthy Arab, a stupid goy, indeed Dame Nature had been kind to me. A Jewish father, a Catholic mother, an Arabic name, a definite sexuality that attracted me to men since childhood, Yes! I had heard it all and was born with it all. I could not count the times I had heard along the way by some passers by, pupils at school or by some college buddies, for any reason and in any kind of circumstances, the numbers of times I had been called a 'Dirty Jew', a' Fucking Queer', a ' Bloody Arab' , or pointed out at as a ' Stupid Goy'. This had been the regular music that rocked my daily rhythm until I left home after studies in Catholic schools and a Jewish college the day my parents got married when I was fourteen. I just could not be missed being called names. The proponents of this last gymnasium had been after their bar-mitzvah sexually quite forward, very early eager to train in private how to use their cut foreskin on the gentile uncut one I had heard in the playground and loud so many times that I was, just in case I had forgotten for a second I was not part of any social group. I could only be freed from it all on Thursdays in the afternoon with Danny Levi as we were off, the son of the rich doctor living opposite the Golden Head Park when we plaid pappy and mammy games every week. He was so young, already getting unconsciously to my mind the idea of an absolute superior power of a circumcised male that filled so well all my female needs and dreams I was discovering with no more complex of being a goy then and that could make me accept their insults in public between boys to assure me I was a woman and definitely one of the strongest kind.''

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